Time to take out the trash

As a busy mom of two, it has never ceased to amaze me how quickly my bin gets full to the brim.

(Yes I realise this is probably a little gross, but bear with me on this, there is a valid point!)

With school runs, grocery shopping, laundry and a million other errands to fit in around keeping the house in a relative state of organised chaos and raising little children, it would seem that emptying my bin has become one of those tasks that I keep putting off. This largely because it is a grim job that involved handling stinky bin liners *gags* and almost always having to pick up a third of the contents that spills over the top or out of the split at the bottom of the overflowing bin liner in the process. I realise that if I just emptied it before it got quite so full then this chore would be far easier and dare I say more pleasant (if that is even possible), but when I get to the bin with two hands filled with dirty tissues, the contents of the breakfast bowl and empty wrappers I am far more inclined to simply squash the rubbish down to make room for more. Of course, its goes without saying that a bin that is not emptied often is usually fairly fragrant, and not in the welcoming cotton linen kind either.

Life can be a bit like a bin at time.... as women and mothers we take on other peoples troubles or 'trash' to help lighten their load and show that we care. This in itself is an admirable thing to do as we empathise with girlfriends and help them to work out their difficulties, but sometimes we take on so much and forget to empty our bin. If we don't take out the trash so to speak, then we are left fermenting over bad attitudes, negative thoughts and stinking thinking which will affect our day to day lives. Negativity is like a cold, it is super easy to spread and will jump from conversation to conversation, clinging to each person and affecting their day too.

The devil loves it when we gossip, moan and whine about each other/our spouse/our family/our house/our job*  (*delete as appropriate.) He can simply sit back and watch us spread discontent and anger across our circles of influence so we must watch what we say and how we say it to everyone, so that a) we will be consistent and b) we do not contaminate everyone else with our own insecurities and issues. That is not to say that we shouldn't share our thoughts and feelings, but there is a right place for us to take our trash so that we can be rid of our negativity without affecting others.

We can take any requests and petitions to God, no matter how big or small they seem, or whether they affect us directly or not. We can also carefully choose a trustworthy friend who can best advise and/or pray with us about our situation. When writing to the Thessalonian church, Paul states that we must never stop praying and praising God in all circumstances, therefore my advice is don't let the trash bring you down, give it to God and put it out for the dustbin men to collect, because when things are looking down it to time to start looking up.

R

Come and rest here.....

Come and rest here......come and lay your burdens down.

The lyrics to Kari Jobe's song 'Here' beckons me to stop, press the pause button on my life and simply be in the presence of God. In a world where we are so crazy busy with appointments, school runs, day jobs, sports and social lives in can seem impossible to fit God in to our lives, especially when we feel like we are being pulled in every direction at once.

Yet that is just what He wants - God desires a relationship with us, not a fast five minute prayer each night before we drift off to sleep, but all of us, all of the time. Colossians 3:23 says 'Do everything as if you are doing it to the Lord', and that means how we rise each day, how we greet our family over coffee in the morning, how we conducts ourselves on the morning commute, how we perform our daily tasks, everything. God wants to be part of our lives, He wants to share the mundane, the little intricacies of our lives that no one else knows because we deem it to be too unimportant to share. God wants to be in that passing thought, that fleeting moment, so that He can reveal Himself to us in a way that we have never experienced before.

In order for God to come in we have to let down our guard, take down the defences and open our hearts to him, warts and all. We need to shake off the shackles of sin, shame and guilt and know in our deepest innermost place that God loves us completely, utterly and totally, just as we are in that exact moment. God doesn't want perfect people, He knew we could never get it right 100% of the time, that is why He sent Jesus. All God needs us to do is to accept Him, accept Jesus, and willingly invite them into our hearts and lives and they will do the rest.

As I listen to this song tonight, I am reminded just how much my God loves me, enough to send my saviour Jesus Christ to die for me. That I am so precious to Him, that he couldn't bear to see me lost forever, but rather He chose to reach out His hand and touch my life that I might be changed forever instead. It has been 10 years this year since I first made the decision to follow Jesus and trust Him with my life, and I have never looked back. Yes there have been tough times, but God has held my hand every step of the way, and the blessings poured back out from heaven have been overwhelming.

This last decade has provided some of the most transformational, defining years of my life, years where I grew to know and love a Saviour who loves me, years where I grew as a woman, becoming more confident in who I am and why I am here, years where I met my lover and soul mate, David Edwards and became his proud wife and mother of his two children.

I am blessed beyond measure, and it is all because I first stopped, and listened to that still small voice ten years ago. My prayer is that I will never stop listening, never stop taking time out to be still and know that He is God, to spend precious time in the presence of the the Lord, being restored, sanctified, healed and embraced by my heavenly father. If you don't know Jesus today, don't wait another moment, invite him in and He will change your life for the better. I would love to pray for you if you make that decision today, otherwise get in touch with your local church who will support you through the early stages of getting to know Jesus and becoming a Christian through valuable resources like Alpha.

God bless you

R xx

PND: Making It Through The Darkness

Anyone who has ever experienced post natal depression to any degree will know that recovery is not n overnight process. However I was not prepared to be struggling with it over three month post diagnosis. My personal experience of PND required Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRI) which I reluctantly took to get me back on track. Within weeks I felt like my old self again, of course there were many emotional low days, but on the whole I was so relieved to feel more in control. My husband has been a constant rock and provided me the best care and support I could have wished for. As my counsellor, lover, partner and best friend, his love and prayers carried me through even the darkest of days.

I struggled with the fact that I relied upon medication to overcome my depression as at the time I thought I should be relying upon God alone for my strength and healing. God quickly silenced my ridiculous ideas by reminding me that if I was sick I would go to hospital for medical intervention and this situation was no different. I thank God that He provides us with knowledge and medical science to alleviate and cure all manner of illnesses, including mental illness. 

I continued with my medication and slowly found my old self again, it felt like looking at your reflection through fogged tinted lenses and as the weeks went by the darkness lifted and the mist cleared.Finally I could see the fun loving, bubbly woman that I used to be. 

My husband regained his wife and my boys regained their mother and my confidence grew and grew so much that I started my own business, Rachel Edwards Writes. I have always regarded motherhood as my highest calling, something that I felt destined to do, however being a successful working business woman in my own right enables me to not only provide a better future for my children, but to to retain my independence and cultivate my creativity. I truly believe that I am a better mother for working and building a business in an industry I am passionate about; writing.

During the festive season and especially in the New Year, I began to do a bit of soul searching and felt that the time was coming to wean myself off the SSRI's. I felt great, and had even forgotten to take the tablets a few times with no detrimental effects, plus I knew that I didn't want to be on medication unless it was absolutely necessary. I prayed about it and felt that it was the right thing to do, but also gave myself the opportunity to go back on them if necessary. The first week off the meds was particularly tough, however I don't think that it has anything to do with the medication, but rather a spiritual battle.The enemy will use anything and everything he can to take you off guard, to make you feel like you can't do something, or that you will fail. He is the prince of lies and desperate to rob us of our joy at any given moment. For the first time in months I felt exposed, vulnerable, weak and scared. 

Looking back I realise this was the devil coming against me. My business was growing successfully and I was wholeheartedly serving God through the leadership team and worship team at Renewal Christian Centre, I was on fire for God and ready to take my relationship with Him to an even higher level. The devil knew this and did his damnedest to make sure I was not in a good place, he wanted to trample my dreams, make me doubt my recovery and my gifts and question my strength and my trust in God. What he didn't account for was the power of God within me. 

God reminded me how precious I am to him, how he only has plans for good, plans to make me prosper, plans to give me a hope and a future. Every time I have read my Bible in the past two weeks I have read about renewing your mind, and it only just occurred to me this morning that God is confirming to me that I am making the right decision in coming off my medication, that He will be my strength and my stay, and that I am changed by a new way of thinking, a transformed Christ-like mindset. Some of the many scriptures God has sown into my heart are below, and I cling to them knowing that He will continue to bring me through the completion of my recovery.

I raised you up for this very purpose, that I might display my power in you and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.Romans 9:17 NIV

Carefully guard your thoughts because they are the source of true life Proverbs 4:23 CEV

Think the same way that Jesus thought Philippians 2:5 CEV

Let God change the way you think Romans 12:2 CEV

Be changed by a new way of thinking Romans 12:2 NIV

You dear children, are from God and have overcome..because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world 1 John 4 NIV

I am not saying that any sufferer of depression should abandon their medication. This decision is personal to me after several months of treatment, counselling and prayer, and my time scale may be very different to someone else's. What I would say to you if you are affected by depression or mental illness is that God loves you, He sent His son Jesus to die for you so that you could be set free from sickness and disease, and He will help you through the darkness and out the other side if you will only open your heart to Him. Whether you remain on medication for six months or six years is irrelevant, the only thing that is important is your salvation and security in Jesus. Let Him in, let Him transform you from the inside out, mind body and soul, and this all starts with giving Him your heart.